After my disastrous week last week, I decided to approach this week with a totally different attitude. I have 2 weeks before my return to work and this coming week, my diary is empty, something totally unheard of. So, I have started my week by putting myself first. I did train at the gym this morning, a short but effective session which I felt positive about. I’ve walked my dogs. And that has been about it. I’ve watched TV, I’ve had a nap, I’ve put my own well being first; something I never do.
The world hasn’t ended, my children are still fine, my house is tidy (the washing didn’t magically put itself away) but I wouldn’t be embarrassed if my mum came round. So, what have I learnt from today? It is really important to take a step away from the busy lives we lead. I had the opportunity today and I took it with both hands. Normally by this point in the day, the guilt would be immense about my waste of a precious day but I needed this today. I needed to reset my brain, not answer my messages or emails, not rush about doing all my errands in one day.
The anxiety about returning to work after such a lengthy absence is at tipping point. I feel sick every time I visualise myself back in my office. I don’t know what to do, I feel like the new girl again, not the confident boss who runs the ship effectively and with precision. My self confidence is at an all time low. Once I have made my return, I will be expected to perform at the highest level so days like today are vital for my own well being.
My eating has been more positive today, I managed to cook and eat a wholesome breakfast, I’ve had a couple of snacks and plenty of fluids. I’ve got dinner cooking and I’m going to put myself a small plate.
All in all, I’m winning on this Monday